And, to be fair, Funny Boy

Today, when I picked Sam up from day care/preschool, I had picked him up a Bug Juice.  He loves Bug Juice.  In fact, when we drive past the gas station where I’ve taken him to pick out his own flavor of sugar-filled drink, he yells, “There’s the Bug Juice store!!!”

But today, I had one waiting for him when I picked him up.  No, my children aren’t spoiled, why do you ask?

He had been running around playing outside, and was sticky and hot, so he was super excited to have a cold drink.  He took a huuuge gulp, and then said:

“Ahhhhhhhh!!!!  That sure hits the spot!”

He’s such a funny boy. 

What she said

40 things I plan to teach my kids

The Boy’s first joke

As you probably know, Sam is a funny little dude.  He’s showing signs of true wit, though.  The other day, my folks came to get him for the day, to give him something special and fun while his sis was at camp.  Which, by the way, THANK THE GODS AND GODDESSES, SHE’S HOME!!!

So Sam was chatting with Pops, my dad.  And he asked Pops, very seriously:

“Pops, what comes after 19?”

Pops answered:  “20.”

Then Sam said, “Hey, Pops – you’re pretty good at this!!!”

But that was just him being his usual funny self; he actually told me a real joke yesterday.

We went to the lake for Father’s Day, and had a fabulous time, as always.  My brother brought his kids down, and there was boat riding, and swimming off my aunt and uncle’s dock, and tubing (Sam’s first time on the tube without one of us!), and lots and lots of eating.  As usual.  Mark made a roasted vegetable puree and several slabs of ribs – one of my dad’s favorite things.  I made a broccoli slaw which was fabulous, and we made more roasted banana ice cream and toasted coconut ice cream.  Everything was delicious.  Well, I wouldn’t know about the ribs, but everyone else seemed to love them.

After we got back from our boat ride, the older kids wanted to fish off the dock, but Sam was very hot, and wanted to go up to the condo.  So I took him up, got him a cold drink, and started fixing supper.  I was flipping through the channels, trying to find something to entertain him and keep him out of the kitchen.  And then I ran across a car race on tv.  Meep.

He was completely absorbed.  He literally froze, standing in front of the tv.  I got him to sit down on that little stool, and snapped a picture.  I’m not sure he even noticed me sitting him down.  Yikes. 

So I fixed his plate, and set him up on the couch with a tv tray so he could watch the race while he ate.  We talked a little bit about race cars, one of his favorite things on the planet.  And he was telling me about what he’d seen on tv during the race, and that race cars drink gas.  And then he said:

“Mommy, I want to show you a joke!”  (so cute)

“Race cars don’t eat food, and people don’t drink gas!!!!”

And then he collapsed in a fit of giggles.  And I nearly died from the cuteness.

The things you learn about weather

So I’m sitting out on the front porch with the kids. They’ve made a fort out of umbrellas, and are enjoying the thunder, lightning, and occasional rain shower. Sam was talking about the thunder being scary, and Lauren and I explained what thunder is. Then they were having fun pretending to be scared.

Sam started talking about the wind, and how it can blow things down.

Like tree limbs.

And trees.

And pants.

Yeah, I don’t know where he comes up with this stuff either!

Another story about The Boy

Yesterday, I took the kids up to my folks’ house for the day while Mark did some stuff around the house.  They had fun, even though my niece and nephew couldn’t come over.

At one point, Sam was running around with a soft bat, playing his version of baseball.  Then he paused in front of Mom and Dad’s flat screen tv, obviously considering touching it with the bat.  Gently or not!

I said, “No, Sam.  Don’t touch the tv with the bat.”

“I not!” (almost appearing offended that I even questioned it)  “If I touch the tv with the bat, I’ll get a time out.“

“That’s right, you could hurt the tv.”

“And if I don’t touch the tv with the bat, I’ll get a prize!!!“

We all cracked up . . .

Clearly, he doesn’t know me very well

Yesterday, Mark took the dog to L’s school for show and tell, and then brought them both home after school.

After work, I picked up The Boy, glad that a monstrous week was over. We headed home.

In the car, we were goofing around and being silly. I was telling him that I’m the luckiest mommy in the whole wide world (which is 100% true, btw). I asked the boy child why he thought I was so lucky.

He cocked his head to the side, thought about it for a second, and then said “Because you’re so sweet!”

Which rather proves my point. I have amazing kids, and I am the luckiest mommy in the world.

Also that he must not know me that well.

Under the heading of “Hope springs eternal . . .”

The Boy, last night:  “You know what?  I like green beans!”

This is news.  Big news.

I blame too many readings of Green Eggs and Ham.  But I have my doubts about S’ unprovoked declaration.  I think Mark will cook tonight, and I plan to ask him to fix green beans.  As a little test, you see. 

Drama Queen, aka Elder Child, had a sad morning.  Her one remaining hamster was just laying there on the wheel, and would barely even move her head.  Considering that chinese dwarf hamsters have a life expectancy of 2 – 3 years, and we’ve had them for 3 years . . . we figured the end is nigh.

L was very sad as she headed to school, very teary.  And asked us to check on her at lunch time.

Mark went home at lunch, and the hamster was moving around as usual, seemed to be fine.  I suppose she was just chilling this morning.  Now there’s a dramatic hamster.

Dramatic hamster, did you say?

Sweetest. Boy. Ever

The Boy, this morning (after we spent yesterday with my folks): “*sigh* I miss Grammy, and I miss Pops. Pops is a good guy. He’s not a mean guy.”

Then, just now while I’m sitting with him in the bathroom (yo, this is real time blogging action): “So, Mommy, how is YOUR day going?”

He cracks me up.

That funny boy

The Boy has been full of the funny for the last couple of days.

Yesterday, Mark picked him up, then picked me up at home, with the plan that he would drop me off to pick up my car at the shop.  Either Sam would stay with me and we would get Lauren from her school nearby, or Sam and Mark would go pick her up. 

So they were discussing whether Sam would stay with Daddy or Mommy, and Sam was adamant that he and Mark would go pick up Lauren.  Why????

Because as he put it:

“It’s our JOB to go get Sissy.  And it’s our PLEASURE!”

I have no idea where he gets this stuff.

Then today, I picked up the kids, Sam first since his day care is near the office.  He and I were goofing around being kind of silly in the car, then I said something, I have no idea what.  But he thought it was great, so he said:

“Rock and roll, bay-beeeeeee!!!!!!”

I have no idea.

That funny boy

I’ve been meaning to post this story all day, and I’ve been busier than hell all day long, so I haven’t had the chance.

But this morning, on the way to day care after dropping L off at school, we were listening to a song called “When I Grow Up” by the Asylum Street Spankers.  Sam liked the tune, and was singing that line happily.  So I turned off the music, and asked him what he wants to be when he grows up.

He paused for a second, then said “I’m going to be a FIREMAN!!!  I’m going to be big like Daddy!”

Because I’m a mean mommy, and also because I saw an opening, I told him that if he wants to be a fireman, then he’ll have to be big and strong so that he can help people, and the way to do that is to eat good healthy foods like fruits and vegetables. 

Because, you know, The Boy never met a vegetable he’d willingly eat, except for french fries.

And then he said “Then I’ll be a leeeetle fireman, and I’ll push the button to make the siren go!”

Curses.

Foiled again.